Parody Songs
“7 Edits” (to the tune of Ariana Grande’s “7 Rings”) came to me mid-flight on my way to the annual American Copy Editors Association conference (ACES). Appropriate, considering I’d be surrounded by editors for the next three days—the only people who could appreciate such a nerdy song.
“7 Edits”
(To the tune of Ariana Grande’s “7 Rings”)
Reading at ACES, and hot coffee bubbles,
People with books who like fixing word fumbles.
Em dashes and hyphens, track changes and things.
Got myself all of my favorite things
Been through some deadlines, I should be exhausted
Who would have thought it would turn out this awesome?
I'd rather be tied up with style and not strings, write my own comments if you know what mean.
My spaces,
no doubles.
Your style,
is trouble.
Make big adjustments,
no words repeating.
You like my error? Gee thanks, just caught it.
I see it, I fix it, reword it, I got it.
I see it, I caught it, I see it, I got it.
I see it, I caught it, I see it, I got it.
You like my error? Gee thanks, just caught it.
I see it, I fix it, reword it, I got it.
Always looking for errors, but you won't catch me snitching. Made matching fixes in six new editions. I'd rather foil all my mistakes with close reading—think fixing grammar, my new addiction.
Who ever said another set of eyes is a problem? Must not of had enough editors to solve them.
They said what you read? I said I read all them. Happiness is the same price as a comma.
My prose is beaming. My copy is gleaming. The way it shine, I know you've seen it.
I bought a style guide just for the knowledge.
Both print and digital, I want it, I got it.
I see it, I caught it, I see it, I got it.
I see it, I caught it, I see it, I got it.
You like my error? Gee thanks, just caught it.
I see it, I fix it, reword it, I got it.
My track changes be looking like shown edits. If it ain't tracked, no transparency. My editing tools are my business tools. The way they be showing the changes for me.
I don't mean to brag, but I be like put it in the style guide.
When you see the edition, it stacked up with new decisions.
“All About That Em Dash” (to the tune of Meghan Trainor’s “All About That Bass”) was born out of boredom and a catchy tune lodged, repeating incessantly, in my head. Why not turn it into a song about my favorite punctuation mark instead?
“All About That Em Dash”
(To the tune of Meghan Trainor’s “All About That Bass”)
Because you know
I’m all about that em dash, bout that em dash—no hyphen.
All about that em dash, bout that em dash—no hyphen.
Yea it’s pretty clear, I make mistakes too
But I can fix it, fix it,
Like I’m supposed to do
Cause I got that eagle eye all the writers chase
And all the right commas in all the right places.
I see them writers, workin’ those different fonts
We know that shits hard to read
C’mon now, make it stop
If you got that grammar knowledge, just raise it up
Cause your paper is perfect from the bottom to the top.
Because you know
I’m all about that em dash, bout that em dash—no hyphen.
All about that em dash, bout that em dash—no hyphen.
I’m bringing punctuation baaaaack.
Go tell those run-on phrases thattttt.
No I’m just playing, I know you think you’re righttt
But I’m here to tell ya
Your paper is a mess, from the bottom to the top.